Father,
I want to be a part of something bigger than me; bigger than life; bigger than what this world has to offer. I desire to be used and I miss the passion that I experienced at CCSG. My life was transformed there and I miss how my former church as a whole lived out their faith. It wasn’t a part time thing; it was a daily life changing thing. And it’s not that CCP is bad, because it isn’t. It is just different here and I haven’t found my place in the body yet. The work was done so easily in California and here it is so hard to initiate ministry. I miss home fellowships Lord. I miss the afterglows and how you would speak into our lives so freely and frequently. I miss how all my friends would just go as you called them to the nations. I miss how contagious it was to be around so many young people who were sold out 100% for you. Send me Lord to the nations; I want to go desperately.
Will you PLEASE do a work like that again? Would you please use me Jesus? Please bring the city of Portland into a passionate relationship with you. Please bring revival to this city. God, please bring laborers who share a common passion for you into this city and use them for your glory. I am not saying that people of CCP don’t love you. I can see that they do, they really love you; but take us deeper Lord. I have seen and experienced what it is like to go deeper and I long for that again. I need to go deeper with you and I pray that you would place that thirst and hunger inside all of us here in Portland.
I really miss the fellowship and fruitfulness of home fellowships. I wish that you would start a new work like this Lord. I miss how your word was so passionately pursued and sought after. I miss my friends so much Lord and I miss being a part of your work in the capacity in which I was involved. I want to be in the field in the same way that my friends are. I want to be a shining light and I pray that I would have some solid focused friends to support me in this passion and vision of carrying your word to the nations of the earth. I hunger to be used for your glory. Please use me Jesus. Cause others to catch the vision that you have and please do a mighty revival. I don’t know how to express what I feel or how to cause others to be as passionate for you as I have seen in my past. All I know is that I want your name to be magnified and lifted up in the hearts of the people of this city like never before. I beg you to do a mighty work here. Please show me what my role is and empower me to fulfill that role with grace and passion. PLEASE SAVE OUR CITY LORD! Please pour out your abundant mercy and compassion and cause others to fall radically in love with you. I need you to do this. Use me lest I die! Take the city of Portland for your glory lest I die! I have to see you move again Lord. I need to see your Spirit move and give life again. I know that is your heart. You love people and this is what you desire. Please use me…I am here and want to be used.
Bill
